Oh Lighten Up

Have you or anyone you love been visually assaulted by a Bravo! Network’s “Real Housewives” mini marathon?



In an attempt to sink their teeth into their victims viewers, Bravo strategically laces the end of each show seamlessly into the beginning of the next. Upon blinking, it would be difficult for the average woman person tell when one episode is ending and the other is beginning. Did I mention I love the show?

Sitting in front of the TV with a bowl of delicious pasta and some NY housewives (with their awesomely petty drama)to keep me entertained was 100% more relaxing than the attempt I made at getting a massage that left me sore (an unable to turn my head to the left for a day) last weekend. There is something about the mindlessness of it all. Somewhere around episode 3 of a marathon, you start to share emotions with these ladies. It is just enough drama to make you forget your troubles but not enough drama to actually stress you out. The New York Housewives are, by far, my favorite. However, I should say New Jersey is sliding in to a close 2nd.

Programs such as this are the "comfort foods" of television so why not cook up some comfort food to go with it? A pasta dish will do the trick, but let's keep it light...there is nothing worse than watching these women with better bodies than most 20 year-olds while burying my face in a 1,000 calorie bowl of heavy creamy pasta.



Real Housewives Shrimp Linguine

(serves 3-4)

1 pkg fresh linguine pasta (12-16 oz)- fresh pasta is really a lot better
1 lb cooked shrimp, med size - peeled and deveined
5 cloves garlic, chopped finely
2 big handfuls fresh spinach leaves
2 tbsp finely chopped shallots
2 lemons
plenty of olive oil
plenty of grated Parmesan cheese (about 1/2 C)
salt and pepper

Boil the fresh pasta as directed (about 2-3 minutes). Drain, drizzle with olive oil and set aside. The Olive oil will help keep it from sticking together.
Remove tails from shrimp.
Toss shrimp in a bowl with salt pepper. Squeeze the juice out of one lemon over the shrimp, and toss again.
In a large skillet or pan, sauté the shallots in olive oil for about 3 minutes over med-high heat.
While the garlic/shallots are sauté, squeeze the juice from 1/2 of a lemon over the leaves, and toss around until evenly coated. Then add the spinach leaves to the skillet/pan.
Cook spinach in the pan with the olive oil, garlic/shallots for another 2 minutes.
Add the shrimp (with any excess lemon juice from the bowl) into the skillet/pan; toss to incorporate (add olive oil as needed).
Now add the pasta (be sure to separate it as much as you can as you put it in the skillet/pan. Continue to add olive oil as needed.
Mix everything in the skillet/pan. Squeeze the juice from the remaining 1/2 lemon over the pasta, and add the Parmesan cheese.
Continue mixing until all ingredients are incorporated and the shrimp is heated all the way through (you do not want to keep it in there too long of the shrimp will get tough).

Anti-Oscar Pasta

The Oscars were on TV tonight, not on the plate.



We are all familiar with the Oscars: the movie award ceremony that honors the best of each given category from best picture to best make-up to best original screenplay. What we all may not be so familiar with is the crab meat oscar.

A delicious innovation in the surf-n-turf section of many fine restaurant menus is the "oscar-style." You can order a "fillet oscar" or even "asparagus oscar" which simply means a small pile of crab-meat (sometimes with a tasty sauce) will come layered on top. It can be a nice upgrade to any meal depending on the establishment at which you choose to dine (although I prefer my steak to come unencumbered, no sauce, no sizzling butter, no oscar).



Since the Oscars were on TV last night, I decided to make the ultimate shellfish dish, 86 the oscar. This pasta involved clams, shrimp and scallops...no crab meat in sight. It comes from a magazine, and no it is not Family Circle. Ok it may be from Family Circle, but I swear this is the last one in a while (mostly because I have exhausted all the recipes from last month's issue). Oh, and the Oscars were fun to watch too. Some highlights for me included:

*The opening dialogue between Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin.
*The straight-faced George Clooney throughout the opening dialogue between Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin.
*The many Meryl Streep references including the one about her being a good kisser.
*Everything involving my new love, Penelope Cruz.

Enough With the Oscars Shell Fish Fettuccine:

(recipe from Family Circle Magazine - makes 4 servings)



2 tbsp olive oil
3/4 lb scallops
3/4 lb large shrimp, shelled and deveined
1/2 tsp salt
1/8 tsp black pepper
2 C fat-free half-and-half
1 tbsp cornstarch
1 can (6.5 ounces) chopped clams, undrained (I drained about 1/2 of the juice)
1 C shredded Swiss Gruyere cheese blend
2 tbsp chopped fresh tarragon
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 box (12 ounces) spinach fettuccine, cooked following package directions
Directions (well, I used a 9oz non-spinach FRESH fettuccine pasta and it was just fine...I did throw some spinach leaves into the mix for added color which turned out wonderfully...fresh pasta can usually be found in the refrigerated section near the cheeses in most grocery stores)

Heat oven to 350 degrees F.
Coat a 3-1/2-quart oval dish with nonstick cooking spray (I used my trusty huge iron skillet so I could do everything in the same dish).
Heat oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat. Add scallops, shrimp, 1/4 teaspoon of the salt and the pepper.
Cook for 2 minutes per side. Remove to a plate.
Blend half-and-half and cornstarch. Bring to a simmer in the skillet.
Simmer 1 minute. Take off heat and stir in clams and the juices, 1/2 cup of the cheese, the tarragon, cayenne and remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt (this is where I mixed in the whole, fresh spinach leaves).
Add cooked shellfish and toss with fettuccine.
Spoon into prepared dish (or in my case, leave it in the oven-safe iron skillet). Sprinkle with remaining 1/2 C cheese.
Bake at 350 degrees F for 20 minutes.

Enjoy with a gin martini and a night at the Oscars.



I know I said it makes four servings, but let's makes that three servings okay?

Fair Stealing

Don't judge me.



Yes, I am one of those people who say, "I love Thai food," but really mean, "I love pad Thai (and I am not really sure about anything else)."

Also, I am becoming cheap. Cooking at home is supposed to be the economic way to eat, but sometimes when making a new or exotic recipe, buying all the ingredients can cost you more than a dinner for two at a nice restaurant. In an attempt to encourage you to try new recipes (or maybe just to allow me to afford the recipes I make), I have come up with a cost-effective scheme I would like to share with all of you: fair stealing.

If you know you will be making something like Pad Thai (or anything for which you lack many of the random ingredients) ahead of time, pay attention to sauces and packets at the places you dine. I am becoming way too cheap to buy the entire bottle of Thai hot sauce (e.g. sriracha) or red pepper flakes (I had never used them before) because of the small amounts of each required for this recipe. I swiped my sriracha from a chicken take-out restaurant I had ordered from that allows you to fill up tiny containers of different hot sauces with your to-go order. I believe I have my lifetime supply of red pepper flakes from our regular pizza joint (I asked the to-go guy to throw a couple packets of the hot stuff in the box). If I know I will be making something using artificial sweetener (like a salad dressing), I just grab a couple extra packets from the coffee shop since it is not something I keep around the kitchen. I happened to have most of the other ingredients for this recipe, but soy sauces and even sometimes fish sauce is freely available at any Chinese restaurant. I do not condone walking into a restaurant, making the grab, and bailing. However, if you are a customer at these sorts of establishments, it is fair game.



Pad Thai. I first tried this popular dish at a Thai restaurant in Orlando. Nutty, hearty, meaty, sweet, spicy, crunchy, dense, umami are words I would use to describe it. Wash it down with a rich glass of Thai iced tea and you are good to go (and by "go" I mean, "not eat for the next 24 hours because you have already used up all your allotted calories"... if you pay attention to that sort of thing). I live on the border of Thai Town and Little Armenia in Los Angeles so I really have my choice of Thai restaurants all the time. This does not serve to explain why I would try making it myself.



Thrifty Pad Thai

(recipe adapted from Recipezaar - makes about 5 servings)

1 (1/2 lb) package rice noodles
6 tablespoons fish sauce
4 tablespoons ketchup
2 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
4 teaspoons sriracha (Thai hot sauce)
4 tablespoons sugar
2 tablespoons peanut oil
3 cloves garlic, mashed
1 lb boneless skinless chicken breast
1/2 lb fresh shrimp, peeled and de-veined, tails removed
1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes (hot)
2 eggs
2 cups bean sprouts
5 green onions
1 cup chopped cilantro
3 limes
1 cup coarsely chopped roasted peanuts

Boil water in a medium-sized pot.
Place noodles in large bowl and cover with the boiling water (they should no longer be on the heat) for 10 minutes.
Drain and set aside.
Mix together fish sauce, ketchup, Worcestershire, Thai hot sauce and sugar, and set aside.
Cut chicken into bite-sized pieces.
Chop about half of the shrimp into small pieces, and leave the other half of them whole
Heat peanut oil in large frying pan or wok.
Add garlic, chicken, shrimp and red pepper flakes.
Cook just until chicken is cooked all the way through.
Add beaten eggs and stir constantly for one minute.
Add sauce mixture and stir for 3 more minutes.
Add drained rice noodles and toss until coated.
Stir in 1 C bean sprouts, onions, 1/2 C of the chopped peanuts and 1/2 cup cilantro.
Stir and toss for another minute.
Garnish each plate with remaining chopped peanuts, cilantro and bean sprouts.
Top with slices or wedges of lime, which will be used to squeeze over noodles upon serving.

Little Plates

Tapas are delightful little plates of appetizers and are generally enjoyed by sharing several with everyone at the table, sometimes to make an entire meal. The word "tapa" means "cover", or "lid" in Spanish. The origin of of tapas is unclear to say the least, but here are a couple of the most popular theories:

*King Alfonso X of Castile liked to order his wine with a small plate or a piece of ham on top to keep flies and sand out. Eventually taverns began putting little bits of food on these small plates.

*King Alfonso X insisted that all Castilian taverns serve small plates of food with each glass of wine to ensure that patrons would not get drunk too easily.

*Tavern owners realized that serving small portions or salty meats with the sweet sherry wines made the patrons thirsty, boosting sales more than enough to make up for the cost of the meat.



While it may (or may not) be fun to speculate what the origin of tapas is, one thing is for sure as far as I am concerned: it is fun to eat them. There are traditional dishes that are made into tapas like torilla de pata, fried calamari, olives, cheeses, serrano ham, croquettes, and patas bravas, but any food can be enjoyed in the tapas-style of eating (there is always wine involved). I made a modest assortment of tapas for a Sunday night dinner this week so these are the recipes I am sharing below:

SHRIMP WRAPPED IN BACON WRAPPED IN ALL THE LOVE IN MY HEART

5 oz thinly sliced bacon (or jamon)
24 large uncooked, headless prawns, peeled
Freshly ground black pepper
1 tablespoon olive oil
2 lemons, quartered

Cut the bacon (or jamon, if using it) into pieces which will wrap generously round the prawns. Place the wrapped prawns down flat on a board and skewer them through the fattest part and the tail, making sure the bacon is firmly fixed. Season generously and drizzle with the oil.

On a high heat, griddle, grill or barbecue place the prawn and bacon skewers
for 2-3 minutes on each side, or until the bacon crisps up. Alternatively , roast in a hot oven (425ºF) on an oiled baking tray for 8-10 minutes. Squeeze over the juice of the lemon wedges and serve immediately.



YOU BETTER BRIE READY FOR THIS

4 servings

1/2 package frozen puff pastry, thawed
1 (8 ounce) package brie cheese, round
1/8 C toasted walnuts, chopped (or whatever nut you want)
1/4 C fruit preserves

Preheat oven to 425.

Lightly grease cookie sheet.
Roll puff pastry out slightly.
Place cheese wheel on top (leave rind on).
Place preserves on top of cheese.
Place walnuts on top of preserves.
Bundle Puff Pastry up and around the cheese.
Bake for 20-25 minutes.
Let cool for five minutes.

Serve with your favorite crackers, pita chips, or whatever sounds good to you! You can also be creative with the preserves. You can switch it up if you don’t want it to be a sweet dish and use a tomato, pesto or olive mixture with pine nuts instead.



CAPRESE SALAD

For 4-5 servings

2 large tomatoes
6 oz buffalo mozzarella cheese (it should come in a package about the size/shape of a baseball)
3 tbsp olive oil
2 tbsp balsamic vinegar
1 4oz bag of mixed greens
chopped fresh basil to taste
salt and black pepper to taste

Slice tomatoes in thick-ish slices (about 1/2 inch)
Slice cheese about the same thickness as tomato slices
Place tomato slices flat on top of a light bed of mixed greens and place a slice of cheese on top of each tomato slice
Drizzle or brush the olive oil on top followed by the balsamic vinegar.
Sprinkle the fresh basil, salt and pepper to taste over top.



CATALAN BREAD

This is so easy you do not really need a recipe. It is just a staple in Spanish cuisine. You just need to cut a baguette longways down the middle, rub it down with a clove of fresh garlic, and toast it slightly. Cut a ripe, juicy tomato down the middle and squeeze it over/smear it onto the bread, rubbing it in well. Drizzle some olive oil (to taste) over the bread, followed by some sea salt (to taste). This bread goes well with Iberico ham, olives, or manchego cheese. It can also add an amazing twist to a traditional grilled manchego cheese sandwich.



Don't forget to set out some small bowls with sliced manchego cheese and whole Spanish green olives along with these little plates and a nice full-bodied red wine.